1. |
Half-Color
03:11
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A redwood you can't see the top of
stands just within sight of
the window of the house I grew up in
that always let in so much light
but now I don't recognize all I thought was mine
was it all a lie adopted over time?
it's all coming down from the walls tonight
it was not there
nothing ever came of it--the clay hands holding stones
'cus you never wanted it, you wanted to be on your own
so he paints the house, from white to some color in between
the walls that once held pictures were always just scaffolding
but now I don't recognize all I thought was mine
were we denying each other keeping quiet?
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2. |
Santa Fe
04:43
|
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I don't believe that you are the right place and time
I am aware that I've had one foot out the door since I arrived
am I wrong?
am I distracting myself again with my hands in clay thinking 'if I could just leave today?'
but when I know, I know, I know
I feel most free when everything is toppled when I'm somewhere in between
doubt is a snake that's slowly swallowing me
wherever you go there you are means I'll never outrun myself no matter how far
the faintest glow feels like the sun when you've locked yourself in the dark
am I wrong?
am I distracting myself again?
I don't need today when yesterday already knows my name
I never expected to need relief from the sun
but to be where the trees lean over the street
has dug in my mind like a vole and it eats all the roots I've tried to grow under my feet
all of my friends do they think I think them a bore when I leave and throw it on the ground right in front of me?
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3. |
Prograde
04:58
|
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It could be Mercury
it could be the return of Saturn
but probably it's just how it is for things to be all upturned at once
this could be all you need
it's not that easy--I just need some time to clear my mind
for me to stand on my two feet and walk on my own
it's been so long since I've felt at home
all you need is light
filtering in through the window
all you need is light
filtering in through the window
having a body means casting a shadow
all you need is light
you used to love
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4. |
Great Whites
03:44
|
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You paint your house in taupe and travertine
it's one of three of your properties
you stay in town a few weeks
however long you like, however long you please
so you can get all you need
a Chagall for your kid's dorm room
was bought with money from the Midland oil boom
borrowing all you like and leave the rest behind to fall by the wayside
to get lost in the dark of night
I don't want to be like you
but to a certain degree
I know there is nothing I can do
'cus I will always be
I found blood in the cracks in the ground
is that how I found it? did I sniff it out?
predatory I hope is the wrong word, but who am I to say
it hurts?
if I continue to come and go
beware of me and mine
great whites
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5. |
Bets
04:03
|
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There's a rabbit in the yard
it's not afraid of me anymore
it's not afraid of the stones that I throw anymore
when I see your face
it's not the same as before
you are not you anymore
now I drive the car
no matter how near or far it is, I drive
now I drive the car
since you've been leaning on my arm in stride
and I wish you would speak
when I drive the car
don't leave me now because I can't let go
you used to know this one with your eyes closed
I feel alive and I feel alone
I feel surprised that I am so
the hat that rests on your knee
looks so strange on the backdrop of your blue jeans
where you were always bare from your knees to your feet
but now I drive the car
no matter how near or far it is, I drive
now I drive the car
since you've been leaning on my arm in stride
and I wish you would just speak to me
when I drive the car
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6. |
Realistic Weatheradio
00:57
|
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7. |
Puppy
05:10
|
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No I won't
I know it's not like me to stay in any one place
could it be the promise of a new trade or the potential
that has me so restrained?
no I won't
I find it so hard to leave this, though I know you won't change
why do I open my heart to the way that you speak
and the way you give?
I'm afraid to say it's been working
I don't like the way you talk to me like
I don't mind the way you talk to me like
am I just an opportunist waiting for the payoff?
or have I been manipulated led along by a fake carrot?
this is not the way you move me
you blame the wood for bending the nail despite the hammer in your hand
this is not the way you move me
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8. |
NC 42
04:40
|
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Waking up to a foggy day, I let your dog outside
we are far from Santa Fe all the way in Carolina
inside feeling the twist of every sight that reminds me
that everything I thought came true
it feels strange living your life in between pages and different sceneries
at the same time
I need an answer soon
I ask myself 'how did I get here?'
there are never straight lines to draw
to living in your house watching you
feed the stray dog in your garage
inside feeling the twist of every sight that reminds me
that everything I thought came true
it feels strange living your life in between pages and different sceneries
at the same time
all at the same time
I'd like an answer for you
I'd like an answer for me too
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9. |
Fruit Tree
02:04
|
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I'm tired of competing my life away
I'm tired of competing so that I can keep my body
I'm tired of wanting more so that I feel okay
one day I will lay down and breathe
one day I will stand on my toes and reach
all I need is a fruit tree
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10. |
I've Been a Mirror
03:42
|
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I've been a mirror staring at a mirror
letting the light bounce back and forth
between me and the me I can see
but eventually it fades
it curls around the tunnel into shade
nothing but darkness
I've been a mirror staring at a mirror
no matter how I try I know I can't go back
I'd rather be the thing through which light refracts
a diamond
a bubble
an eyelash
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